True navigation begins in the human heart. It’s the most important map of all.
Elizabeth Kapu’uwailani Lindsey, National Geographic Fellow

My experiences with psychosis left me in an emotional and spiritual wilderness. A wilderness where I was lost and had no idea how to find my way out. Like I have said in a webinar with NAMI North Carolina, when my mind failed me, my heart had to grow. Just like a blind person can acquire sharper hearing, I had to feel my way through things instead of thinking my way through things. I learned how to listen to my heart more and understand what really matters in life. I learned to follow my heart to find my way out of pain, hopelessness, and shame, where my strengthened heart afforded me the patience to hold out for a better day.
I had always rehashed analytical thinking in my life that got me nowhere, but my psychotic breaks forced me in a new direction that was ultimately for my benefit. When I was reduced to so little, the one thing I could always choose is love as my guiding light. I could always choose to love myself in a way that was not measured by external markers of success. I could always appreciate my own humanity. I could choose to love me even when I didn’t know if I had a future or not, and I realized that I could always choose goodwill towards others instead of bitterness and jealousy.
The only way my heart could navigate me out of my situation is to hear what my heart told me it wants, and that was meaning. My heart told me that I wanted to help others, and so I obeyed. I also realized through listening to my heart that positive thoughts and attitudes are more powerful than anger, unforgiveness, shame, blame, and a negative attitude. I had thought if I stayed angry, I was telling the universe it was not okay what I have gone through, but I realized the ultimate defiance to what I went through is to choose positivity.
Positivity stems from the heart, and the only way out of darkness is to ignite a flame. The ultimate way to start your navigation out of emotional pain, hopelessness, and uncertainty is to choose compassion and unlimited acceptance for yourself in your current condition and situation, which are manifestations of love. No matter where you are in your journey, your human existence and the love inside of you is immeasurably and uniquely valuable.
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